The Journal of Sam Winchester

(not Sammy)

i'm on the phone
Sam Winchester psychic_wonder
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Room 320, Friday Evening
Sam had spent the better part of two days thinking about Peter's drawing, and he wasn't any closer to figuring out what it meant - or, at least, what it could realistically mean. As much as he hated to bother other people with his issues, this was something he couldn't work on alone. Luckily, there was one person he could call who might not think he was completely insane.

[For one, please!]

Isabel was work. Seeing Sam's name on Caller ID, she ducked into the back service hallway and answered.

"Sam. Hi. How are you?" An immediate debate began in her head over telling Sam what she'd learned from Nathan's dream, even if she still wasn't sure it was the truth.

Sam sighed in relief at not getting Isabel's voicemail. "I--I'm not quite sure, actually. Is this an okay time, I don't want to interrupt anything."

"The salesmen are happily drinking at their reception," Isabel replied. "As long as the booze keeps flowing, I've got some time. What's up? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm all right," Sam assured her quickly. "I just need someone to talk to because I think I might be going crazy, and you're the closest I've got to someone who might understand." He sighed softly, hoping this wasn't a mistake. "Do you remember when you came to tell me what happened to Peter and you gave me a letter he'd written for me?"

"You're not going crazy," she promised immediately. "It's just been a tough few months. I do remember the letter. What about it?"

"Uh, well, I found something on it, on the back," Sam said, looking at the letter again as he spoke. "There's a picture of me and Peter together and--and it's good. Like, Peter's-drawing-ability good."

"Like when he drew me on the beach? After I'd been grabbed?" Isabel asked hardly daring to breath.

"Exactly like that," Sam said. "The thing is, we weren't together after Peter drew that. I mean, he wrote that letter before the explosion and I wasn't there and..." He trailed off for a moment, trying to slow down to a less babbling pace. "The drawing has to be a mistake, right? A fluke in his ability? 'Cause the only other answer is that Peter's not dead I said, I must be going crazy."

Isabel pressed her fist to her mouth to keep from yelling out loud. "You're not going crazy Sam. I think you're right," she said finally. "Did you by any chance see the alumni newsletter from early December? Mine got shoved in a pile of papers. I only got a chance to look at it earlier this week."

"You think I'm right?" Sam said, not having expected that answer. "No, I didn't see the newsletter. Why?"

"Because while it talked about Peter dying, when it talked about Nathan, it implied that he was still alive," Isabel explained, still mad at herself for not seeing the newsletter when it first appeared. "I went to see Angela on Monday. I figured if Nathan was hurt, I could get my brother or Wyatt to heal him. She was just thrilled to see me." The sarcasm in her voice probably dripped through Sam's phone.

Edited at 2010-01-30 03:32 am (UTC)

The growling sound Sam made might have given Isabel a clue as to how he felt about Angela. "What did she say? Does she know anything about Nathan and Peter?"

"Nathan's badly injured tucked away in a hospital somewhere. She wouldn't tell me where," she said.

One of the food servers from the reception approached and Isabel waved him off. The salesmen would just have to deal for a little while longers.

"I dreamwalked him the other night, trying to find out where he was. I couldn't though. He's so drugged up and guilt ridden, he's just stuck in a church reliving the soundtrack of that night." Sounds that even thinking about, still made Isabel shudder. "It's as horrible as you expect. Until the very end. Then I heard Peter's voice, telling someone to take care of Nathan. So he must have been the one to bring Nathan to an ER."

"And that's not the only reason I think you're right."

The fact that Nathan was alive made Sam's heart pound faster, and he had to work to make himself believe that he wasn't dreaming this whole conversation. "If Peter brought Nathan to the ER, that had to be after the explosion," he said in disbelief. "What's the other reason?"

If he was dreaming, somehow he and Isabel were having the same one. "Because I'm pretty sure I dreamwalked him back in December."

"I fell asleep with a picture and then next thing you know, I'm talking to Peter. It was a short dream, nightmare really." Especially when she considered the emotional state Peter appeared to be in. "I woke up and couldn't believe it was real. After all, who could survive a nuclear explosion?" she asked sadly.

Edited at 2010-01-30 04:11 am (UTC)

For all that Sam had thought about the possibility of Peter being alive, he hadn't considered what kind of mental state Peter might be in after everything that had happened. "I don't blame you for thinking it was a nightmare. I would have thought the same thing," he said. "But if you did dreamwalk him...if he got Nathan taken care of and think he could really be okay?"

"Physically yeah," Isabel said slowly. "But mentally? After seeing how guilty Nathan feels? And knowing Peter? He's probably been eating himself up with guilt. I tried to dreamwalk him, after Nathan then other night. I couldn't do it. I thought maybe it was just Nathan's dream after all. But if he did a drawing showing the two of you together, then he's alive. I believe that, no doubt."

"Isabel, I swear I could kiss you through this phone right now," Sam said, and he couldn't fight the feeling of excitement that was starting to come over him. "Will you keep trying the dreamwalking? If we can find Peter, we can make him better, no matter how guilty he might feel. None of this is his fault, he'll have to realize that."

"Mutual Sam. Definitely mutual," she laughed, her smile wide. "I will keep trying. He's going to have to stop beating himself up and sleep at some point and when he does. I'll be there. We're going to find him Sam. I promise."

"I can work from here to see if he can be located, and maybe we can track him down that way," Sam said. "I--thank you. For listening to me and not thinking I'm nuts and for trying to find Nathan and just everything."

"No thanks. If I'd seen the newsletter when if first came out, if I'd put all the pieces together..." Isabel wasn't going to forgive herself for that anytime soon. "But as soon as I know something, you'll be the first to know."

"Same here," Sam said. "I'd better let you get back to work and all." Especially since he had work of his own to do now. "I'll talk to you soon, I hope."

"I'll be counting minutes till I get off. Which is," she said after a check of her watch, "Two hours for now. I'll be heading into dreamland as soon as I get home. Hopefully you'll hear from me in a couple of hours."

Another server appeared, wearing a look of oh god, there's a crisis and Isabel sighed. "But first, the drunken salesmen need me. Take care Sam. I'll talk to you soon."


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